I have now had my hand in healthcare in some way, shape, or form for the last 7 or 8 years and as a provider, I realize how many people are looking for the magic little pill that will fix their problems. It may be weight for some, for others it's the feeling of hopelessness, for others it's the back pain. We want to be fixed! And TV commercials claim that there's got to be a cure for EVERYTHING! Don't even get me started on Dr. Oz...but I digress.
My usual spiel sounds something like, "I think these medications can help with what you are facing, but they aren't going to take away (the food, the temptations, the relative that pisses you off, the fact that you are spending a majority of your day not moving, thus making your back pain worse)." The truth is, I don't have a magic pill for anything that's hard or uncomfortable in life, but you do.
Let me give you an amazing example. I have a friend named Katie. She is one of the most talented people I know. She can create a cake just by looking at a picture. She's an amazing mother and wife. She has this gift that allows her to connect with people she hardly knows, and she also has this ability to welcome people into the things she's doing. She's also been able to lose an incredible amount of weight! She recently fit into her wedding dress (how many of us can say that?)! And I'm going to share Katie's secret, because it applies across so many things, it's the magic little pill that we don't want to swallow. Katie has an awesome story, it's an inspiration really, but it's not the training program she's used or the diet she's followed. The awesomeness of her transformation is that it was all Katie.
She made the decision to make some very drastic life changes. She's the one who sets aside 30 minutes a day to exercise, to stay away from the foods that plagued her for so long. She's the one who decided she deserved to be healthy. I make excuses every day for myself, fall into temptations and berate myself for the horrible way I feel later. It's a vicious cycle and I want the magic pill to fix the way I feel...instead I choose the magic candy bar in a lot of cases.
The reason I find Katie so inspiring though, is because she has shown me that this "magic" applies to so many other aspects of our struggle with this thing called life. I have too many patients who rely on the medicine to "fix" their diabetes or high blood pressure, but the truth is, THEY are the only ones who can truly change. The people who are suffering from depression have to have a plan to combat those triggers that will surely come and get ready to fight the bad days (along with the meds, I'm a big proponent of multi-layered therapy). The person who wants to better their life even though everyone tells them that it's impossible has only to prove that they can't to themselves.
We have to stop waiting for our magic pill, lottery win, or whatever else we have drawn up as our answer to the hard questions. We are the answer to the questions. We are the ones deciding how we handle the situations that leave us feeling distraught and empty. I know I don't have all the answers on how to get through the hard things, or on how to make significant changes, but another thing Katie has taught me is that by putting yourself out there and really attempting to change for the better, people come out of the wood work to support you, and others are curious about your secret because they want in on the good stuff too. And a community can come up with some pretty good tips on getting through the stumbling blocks. Community can help us be honest with ourselves and see that we are our own worst saboteurs. Community is what we have to have to function in this scary, sometimes awful world.
So clearly, there's no magic recipe, pill or anything else. Anything we want is not going to happen overnight because we have to make the necessary changes to lay a foundation that last. We just have to take it one day at a time and make our best effort every day and have a plan to get back on track when we falter. We have to realize that we are awesome and we need to start wanting the best for ourselves. And if you are lucky enough to have a friend like mine, you'll hopefully find a way to inspire each other!
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