Who Is My Neighbor?

This past Thursday in Chattanooga could be described as the most surreal of my life. The nurse practitioner student at our clinic reported a shooting at the river park my family frequents often. My first thought was my husband, who will sometimes go for a mid-morning run. Could he have been there? A text confirming that he was fine put that to rest quickly. Then word came in that there were other places in the city where gunfire had broken out and that this was a shooting rampage. The hospitals were on lockdown, my children's daycare was on lockdown. My next worry was could we pick the kids up. More news stories revealed the gruesome details of the day. First, an officer injured, then death (but no known count), then the shooter dead. Four Marines died Thursday and a sailor lost his life 2 days later due to injuries sustained at the scene. By 4pm on Thursday, the name of the gunman started appearing on local and national new sources. And then, the announcement that he lived in a middle-class neighborhood in Hixson, TN. My husband called shortly after that telling me not to take the kids home, our neighborhood was on lockdown and a raid was being conducted about 10 houses down. That's right, my neighbor was a gunman in a crime that is now an international investigation.

I would like to say I felt something when all of this was revealed. But the truth is, I didn't know what to feel. Maybe the first inappropriate thought on my mind was that our house was not likely to sell after this. The next thought was just disgust that my life had been inconvenienced. But as the days have started to separate from the initial numbness and shock of a terror attack that was literally so close to home, I've begun thinking, who is my neighbor and how am I suppose to react in this situation?

I didn't know the family personally. I would say hello or wave as we walked the dog around the cul-de-sac. I knew they were Muslim by their garb but I didn't have any other interaction in the split seconds we were in each others presence. I was asked by reporters if there were any signs or anything weird and I honestly answered that our neighborhood was a quiet and nice one. People were always cordial but other than a select few, I didn't know anyone all that well. So who was my neighbor? I don't know. And who are still my neighbors? That I cannot tell you either.

I am Christ follower and I have also been through a very public family ordeal so as I felt emotions welling up, it took a while to recognize that maybe God had something to say about how I publicly addressed this issue, about how I condemned the killer, but yet how I will learn to be a neighbor to those other people who don't act or look or believe like me. "Love your neighbor, but hate your enemy..." But Lord, what if that person is both? But God says, look at what I sent my son to say about that. Matthew 5:38-48 "It is said 'Eye for an eye, and tooth for a tooth.' But I tell you do not resist an evil person. If anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the left one also. And if anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your cloak as well. If anyone forces you to go one mile, go a second with them as well. Give to the one who asks you and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. You have heard 'love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those that persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect."

I am not going to say that I know how to do that. I feel like if any sympathy is given to this man's family, people are quick to label it anti-American or claim that I couldn't possibly grieve the soldiers as well. I'm getting really dismayed at the current rhetoric in our country where we have to constantly choose a side and it's always an all or nothing stance. I want to still hope that the family did not know what was going on, and if that's true, how even more devastated they are than the rest of us.

As I drove by the memorial at the Naval Center yesterday, the overwhelming sense of loss hit me. I realized that those 5 servicemen took the same road into work that day, not anticipating it would be their last. They probably had a false sense of security, just as I do everyday, that this is America and things like attacks on military and civilians happen in "other places". And I just cried. I am so devastated that this happen to those neighbors guarding our country. It wasn't fair or just and it could've been me pulling into that park that day.

Isaiah, my oldest son, has been identifying lots of people as his neighbors recently. I don't know when this idea was planted in him, but he's been questioning, "Mom, are they my neighbor?" a lot. Finally, yesterday he boldly stated that we are just all neighbors in this world. Ugh, out of the mouths of babes! Why does Jesus give us such a hard task of loving all. And here my son is reiterating that love in simplest terms. The comments section on any of the recent news stories provides ample proof that we are certainly not doing a very good job of showing the world the command Jesus gives in Matthew 5:38-48. It is so easy to be convicted and righteous on the internet. We never see the other people eye-to-eye, we never engage in a way that builds relationships, we never assume we will be in a similar situation. So words can be used as daggers. But what about when you know someone outside the headlines? What about caring about what happens to them when the camera and news crews have gone on to the next great story? That's when we show our neighbors, enemies, loved ones and friends that there is a God of grace, love, and hope. And we portray that in our lives so that they start to ask, "How do I get some of that?" Jesus never solved a problem by responding in a comments section. He engaged those who needed to hear of grace and love. And he stood by those who weren't considered a good neighbor.

My neighbor is a gunman who heinously killed 5 people in Chattanooga on July 16th, 2015. His actions hurt people across this entire community and country. But if I allow my response to continue the hurt, then nothing in this world will ever change. The news headlines will capture these cowardly acts more and more often, and it becomes the glorification of death. Because if we don't become neighbors who care for and love one another, we have missed the opportunity to share Christ's radical message of love and life. And if that doesn't get transmitted to this weary world, I fear what is to come. This is my call to fill my heart with the message Christ so clearly gives and to live it instead of just write about it. Because there is no telling when someone shares this love, what could change in the hearts of those who get to experience it.